“Overthinking: the art of creating new problems out of ones that never existed in the first place.”
Have you ever begun dating someone new and found yourself overthinking the state of your relationship?
Most people struggle to quit overthinking because they are guilty of it. Of course, it’s simpler to say than to do.
It can be pretty difficult to resist going over everything repeatedly in the early days of a new relationship in a futile effort to either acquire control or predict the future. Your choices about reality have a big impact on what you’ll do next.
Consider it an indication of out-of-control overthinking if you are preoccupied with “what if” scenarios and then make decisions based on hypothetical situations. The same holds true if you constantly seem to be dwelling on the past or worried about the future rather than being present in the present.
When that happens, you stop concentrating on your connection, which is one reason overthinking in a relationship may cause you and your partner to become estranged. In light of this, here are a few sensible methods to stop thinking about the “what ifs” and instead connect with your partner.
1. Send Texts & Move On
Saying “hey,” “hi,” or “hello” is appropriate. How much is too much of a good thing? I want to come off casual. Can I text back after waiting five minutes? Or 15?
While fretting about what to text a partner can occur at any time, it most frequently occurs during the initial stages of dating. It’s very normal to feel both excited and anxious about a potential new relationship, but overanalyzing it can also ruin it.
The person you broke up with was not someone you needed to be with, even if you accidentally said “hello” instead of “hey.” Therefore, exhale deeply, send the text, and carry on with your day. You may avoid overanalyzing things if you allow yourself to balance your life and this new person.
2. Quit Searching for Hidden Meanings.
He either will or won’t make a call. You either have his favor or not. In due time, everything will become clear.
There is probably no hidden significance to the seemingly insignificant events. The outcome won’t alter if you put yourself in an emotional state where you’re holding on to what they’re doing and saying, and you can even end up creating an issue when there wasn’t one before.
3. Stop Rereading Their Texts
Even if there are moments when it’s vital to interpret a partner’s text and formulate the ideal response, such as when you’re arguing, routine texts don’t usually call for a second reading. As a result, stop yourself if you discover yourself going through them or trying to find a fault.
Call your partner to discuss if a certain text is genuinely bothering you rather than trying to “figure out” how they feel by overanalyzing.
4. Cultivate Artful Distractions for Yourself
A fantastic technique to prevent overanalyzing what is occurring is to continue participating in your hobbies and interests, even when things are going well with someone new. Distractions can also greatly assist you in developing your ability to stay in the present moment.
You might even discover that you need to date multiple people at once to avoid concentrating on the specifics of any one of them, which is a completely acceptable method of self-distraction.
5. Don’t Overanalyze Their Body Language
In-person, you might find yourself doing the same thing, listening for warning flags in your partner’s tone of voice or body language.
If that’s the case, you might be overanalyzing your union as a result of your muddled communication. You can be left wondering what exactly your partner meant when they use vague terms when speaking to you.
Work on enhancing your mutual communication to get clarity. Because you’ll already know the answers, you won’t need to come up with any.
6. Stay Grounded
Overthinkers frequently find it difficult to believe that what they perceive and encounter is the complete picture. You question whether the relationship will “work out” or if your partner genuinely likes you, which is why you have underlying anxiety.
Remembering to remain present and grounded can be helpful once more. You can lessen your worry and propensity to let your mind wander by practicing grounding. So constantly remind yourself to live in the now rather than worrying about what might go wrong.
The other person may feel stifled if you become overly attached if you decide that everything is going great. If you decide that things are going badly, you can sabotage it and shut it off early, or you can accidentally convey that you aren’t engaged.
This is why it’s twice as crucial to adopt a “wait and see” attitude in regard to a new relationship rather than attempting to over-interpret the cues.