How To Overcome Excessive Love For Someone
You believe it is normal to feel the need to be with your lover constantly since you love them. In initial relationships, specifically, the “desire to integrate” is very prevalent. However, if you love too much, your partner could feel suffocated. Your companion is probably going to feel like you’re suffocating them, and you want the relationship to end.
You may have crossed the line into borderline fixation if your partner has complained that you are being overly touchy or that you are beginning to smother them.
Even in the beginning, it’s simple to fall into this trap, but there are strategies to prevent it from spiraling out of control.
9 Ways to Overcome Excessive Love For Someone
1. Distract Yourself From Fixating On the Person
Plan distractions that will keep you busy and divert your attention. The more you allow yourself to think about the person you’re trying to avoid like, the more likely you are to become fixated on them and go in the wrong direction. Therefore, change your course anytime they do enter your mind! Engage in a constructive endeavor that keeps you busy and focused. You could, for example, read a book, make a call, solve a puzzle, sketch, play a video game, crochet, clean, or take a stroll.
2. Take a Breather
Set a goal for yourself to take a break if things are getting too intense and you’re having trouble giving your partner space.
While a break from the relationship isn’t necessary, it’s a good idea to give yourself a few days to calm down and avoid smothering them. Set an alarm for the end of the day so you don’t text them endlessly; when the alarm goes off, you say goodnight and give them some space.
3. Do Things You Really Enjoy
Spend time doing the things that make you happy and content. Take an art lesson if you enjoy painting. Consider forming a garage band if you enjoy playing the guitar. Go for it if you enjoy staging dolls for photos of them performing in a circus! As long as you make a wise decision that sets your mind on a constructive course, it doesn’t matter what you choose.
4. Spend More Time Alone
If it seems like you love them too much, it may be because your relationship has taken over your life and you’ve been feeling unusually clingy lately.
Even the finest among us might fall victim to this; after spending all of our time with them, we start to rely more and more on them to satisfy us, frequently by demanding continual emotional and affectionate connection.
Learn to love being alone once more to try and relieve some of this pressure.
Give them some room, go on a coffee date, or occasionally spend the night alone.
Find a new pastime that is exclusive to you and will make your alone time more valuable. You can keep yourself occupied enough to prevent boredom or loneliness, and you won’t miss your companion or feel inclined to rush back to see them!
5. Spend More Time With Others
Spend time with others rather than spending time alone with your thoughts. Your ability to think about Mr. or Ms. Wrong will decrease the more time you spend concentrating on other individuals. Your thoughts may wander and those emotions will resurface if you arrive home late at night and have too much time to yourself. However, if you are surrounded by people, you will remain active and experience the emotional benefits of being sociable.
6. Start Hanging Out With Friends More
Once more, you must take a step back from the relationship and quit adoring your lover.
A terrific way to feel content and engaged, to have interesting conversations, and to feel respected as a person is to spend time with friends.
Even though you aren’t with your lover, you are still talking to and hanging out with your loved ones.
They’ll be able to occupy and divert you, and they can assist in enforcing a no-texting policy while you’re with them to make sure you haven’t elevated your clinginess to new, digital heights.
7. Give Yourself The Advice You’d Give a Friend
Consider the situation’s benefits and drawbacks while remaining as sensible as you can. Try to take a step back and visualize yourself as an observer rather than being actively involved. Pretend you’re aiding a pal who’s in love if it helps. For many good, sane, and practical reasons, if you would urge them not to pursue the connection, do the same for yourself!
8. Spend Time With Other Couples
When you’ve always been this way and don’t feel odd about it, being too loving can sometimes feel pretty normal.
You may improve your conduct and gain insight into how other couples interact with one another by spending time with other couples.
You can come to the conclusion that you’re being a little bit too intense with your lover and that other individuals aren’t truly as intense.
9. Come up With “if-then” Plans
Prepare a plan of action for when a problem develops. Though you have no control over your desires, you do have influence over your behavior. Consider it this way: a healthy diet prevents you from eating french fries when you want them by having a healthier alternative available. It does not prevent you from wanting french fries. Similarly, “if” (and “when”) you feel the impulse to phone the wrong person, “then” have a strategy in place to call your closest buddy in their place. ” If you want to take out your phone and send that Mr./Ms. Wrong a text, then “instead, use your phone to play your favorite game.
We all experience moments of intensity with our partners, whether it’s to express our love, bury our worries, or let others know that our partner is already taken.
Exploring the causes of your clinginess will put you in a far better position to take positive action, make healthy changes, and move toward a more harmonious, less suffocating relationship.